It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
