Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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