You really coming over, don't trick.
We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
so that wasnt chicken after all
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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