I have demons in me.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
