the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
be right there i have to get my cape
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
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