What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
