You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
vagina is talking i cant
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
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