you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize
