We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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