Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
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