btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
