He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize