I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
