I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
