the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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