You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
my nose is crying tears of wow.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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