You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
