I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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