Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize