why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
