no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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