if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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