and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Randomize
