Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
