"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
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