I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
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