took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize