I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
