whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
