i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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