I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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