i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
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