Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
