His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Randomize
