Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
