guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
