I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
