My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
The uberlube is also flammable
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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