oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
