im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
