I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
