And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
love makes seman taste better
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
