ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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