forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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