can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
she looked like the before picture.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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