I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Quick, to the slutcave!
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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