I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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