so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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