shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
why is half of my head shaved?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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