Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Sex in the backyard? Check.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
