There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
