I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize